Ultimate Self Confidence – The ultimate secrets of total self-confidence. Self-confidence is a mental attitude of believing, trusting and relying on oneself and one´s abilities. It can also be defined as the self-assuredness in your own power and personal judgment. True self-confidence is all about feeling comfortable even in situations with unknown outcome and uncertainty in general. A lack of self-confidence is called low self-esteem, timidity or timidness.
Low self-esteem can be one of the biggest obstacles people need to overcome in order to develop their personality to a further level, achieve career advancement and reach their personal goals and visions in life. A lack in self-assuredness and the unwillingness to build up self-confidence can confound all your other efforts and attempts to become successful.
What is true self-confidence/ultimate self-confidence?
True self confidence or ultimate self confidence is accompanied by the “whatever it takes” attitude, where you promise yourself to try as hard as you can to reach your ambitions and goals, no matter how difficult it will be.
Ultimate Self Confidence
How to gain self-confidence and how to improve your self-esteem?
Part I: Introduction
I have a very positive message for you: Absolutely no person is born with high self-esteem. In fact: only a small fraction of our characteristics are inherited – the vastly greater part is being imposed by society, our parents and friends, or simply semiskilled by us selves. Unfortunately, we also adopted a lot of negative mindsets and characteristics from our environment, a lack of confidence included. Furthermore, it is also true that a person’s confidence can change as a result of an event (a dependent boy takes responsibility for his siblings after the death of his parents, a confident person that had a lot of faith in himself becomes afraid of other people after being brutally robbed). This proves that our characteristics are not determined by our genes; can change drastically by stressful circumstances or be developed to a more positive level!
The fact that positive self-confidence is not inherited is great news for everybody that wants to develop confidence and improve self-esteem as this ambitious personal development can be a success if the right methods and strategies are being applied. As a consequence, you are able to change every aspect of your personality into a more positive one.
Part II: Self-restraint & self-restrictive attitudes
Part I thought us that every individual that is willing to improve its self-esteem can succeed, as our self-confidence is not genetically determined. Unfortunately, a lot of people have extremely self-limiting attitudes and beliefs such as “That’s the way I am. It’s my character!” as well as “I simply stay true to myself”, which limits their chances to succeed in building self-confidence. If you really want to boost self-esteem and develop an ultimate self-confidence you need to prevent these self-restrictive attitudes from influencing your behavior!
Part III: You need to be aware that…
There is no magic bullet that will allow you to gain ultimate self-confidence within a week or so. Building self-esteem requires a lot of effort, commitment, dedication and engagement that you need to invest into your development. But if you are willing to show this necessary commitment the return-of-invest will amaze you!
Be open-minded and motivated to implement the following techniques into your life (imagine how your life will be with a lot more self-respect and self-assuredness; this will increase your motivation drastically!).
Part IV: True self-esteem and ultimate self-confidence
#1 Discover your identity!
Knowing exactly who you are; who you want to be and what you want to achieve in your life is an essential characteristic of true self-esteem. As opposed to this: a lack to discover positive characteristics and skills is an attribute that many people with low self-esteem have in common. Instead, they only recognize negative characteristics and visualize these repeatedly. Therefore I want you to discover your identity with all your positive characteristics, skills and abilities: Grab a piece of paper or a notepad and write down all your characteristics that you as well as other people (your friends) like about your personality!
You can write as many positive characteristics about yourself down as you would like to! The more positive aspects you discover the better!
#2 What kind of values, attitudes, and characteristics would you like to develop in the future?
Similar as in #1 you can take a piece of paper and write down all those values you would like to be known for! I’m sure you will find a lot of characteristics you would like to develop; to increase your results write down attitudes and values of a famous person you would like to become friends with (such as Bruce Willis, James Bond, Batman, etc.). Evaluate the exact reasons you would like to become friends with this fictional or famous person – what would you expect from such a friendship? Repeat #2 with at least two famous and/or fictional personalities!
Explanation: all the values and characteristics about the famous persons you wrote down are characteristics that are very attractive and that you seek in others. Start to develop these attitudes and values in your own personality, so that you finally have the same or similar characteristics you expect from a famous person, which will arrange your way to ultimate self-confidence.
Summary of #1 & #2: The reason I gave you these tasks is that I truly believe that only a person that knows himself fully and whole-heartedly accepts or even loves himself is able to gain self esteem, more confidence and literally boost confidence in general to achieve ultimate self confidence.
#3 Another tip to reach ultimate self-confidence
Start to implement the following “steps to self-confidence” to build confidence and self-esteem:
- Be non-judgmental: It is very important that you don’t judge yourself; do not even attempt to judge others! Self-judgment can be very destructive, especially when you continuously judge yourself!
- Be independent: Be independent about what others might think about you! The majority of people that are not confident try everything they can to be regarded from their environment as “cool, funny”, etc. In fact, their behavior will only be recognized as neediness or weirdness.
- Be unattached: Become unattached to unjustified criticism. This kind of criticism shows you that you are actually doing something right! Otherwise, others wouldn’t be so green-eyed to confront you with their unjustified critique.
#4 Habits that will boost confidence:
Imagine just for a second a person with ultimate self-confidence. Does this person behave stressed or is it in hectic? I’m very sure it won’t be!
- Be prepared for the day! Confident people live their lives calm and relaxed, always prepared for the challenges of their day and don’t panic when an unknown stressful situation occurs.The way you behave will have a considerable effect on others; either positively, or negatively.
- Pay attention how you behave! People with high self-esteem have a high level of awareness on how they behave and how others might consider their behavior. A self-confident body language, the way you speak and your facial expression will not only increase your outcome with others but also enable you to achieve ultimate self-confidence.
Part V: Ultimate self confidence via independence
Being ultimate self-confident means you have set yourself free from attempts to seek external validation, acknowledgment and admiration from other people. True self-confidence needs no external confirmation. A person that is ultimate self-confident is also independent of the opinion of others and unlikely to be influenced negatively by them. True self-esteem comes from the inside; the knowledge and appreciation of one’s abilities and characteristics.
Part VI: The influence of your subconsciousness
Your subconsciousness has access to all your experiences and occurrences that are stored in your memory. If you are now going to ask yourself a question such as “Why am I not self-confident?” your subconsciousness will search for an answer to your question in your memory and come up with an experience from your past. Due to the question, your subconsciousness will come up with a lot of negative events from your past that give you evidence for your low self-esteem. This basically means that you strengthen your negative beliefs by asking similar questions to the one above.
The trick is to ask yourself positively formulated questions, that can’t be answered from your subconsciousness with negative believes and experiences from the past:
- When did I feel very self-confident?
- What do other people like about me?
- What do I like about my personality?
- What makes me special?
Part VII: Watch what you say!
Have you ever noticed that you felt very uncomfortable when you talked about topics that are highly charged with negative feelings? The reason for this is that we associate specific words with either positive or negative feeling. Negative words will make you feel uncomfortable or depressed; it is, therefore, important that start to identify these words and change them with a more positive word:
- I am not self-confident. –> I’m currently increasing my self-confidence to a higher level!
- I’m very angry. –> I’m a bit upset.
- I have got a lot of problems. –> There are a lot of challenges in my life that I’m going to master!
Part VIII: Be proactive
Behaving reactive to the behavior of others allows outside influences to affect your mood in a negative way. Even worse: these influences can also affect your self-confidence. In contrast to this: being a proactive person that takes control over his life and clearly expresses his goals will empower itself and gain self-esteem.
Part IX: Stop negative imaginations!
When people are afraid of something they most likely imagine all kinds of worse outcomes that could happen. This is not only very negative as it will increase their fear about the event, but it also increases the chances that the imagined event will occur. So in case, you imagine yourself behaving extremely insecure and not confident due to your negative believes you should start to actively change the imagination to a more positive one where you start to act self-confident.
Part X: Positive affirmations for self-confidence
Positive affirmations for self-confidence can help you to improve self-esteem drastically and will boost confidence when applied properly.
A short guide for positive affirmations for self-confidence:
- Don’t use inappropriate words! Keep attention to the words you are using in your phrase so that you don’t use words you associate with negative emotions.
- The right mental state: Make sure that you are in the right mental state when you start your affirmations! It is necessary that you are relaxed and feel comfortable.
- Write your affirmations down!
- Visualize your affirmation!
In the following I will show you some very helpful positive affirmations for self-confidence:
- “I am very thankful that I’m a confident and outgoing person”
- “I have faith and trust in myself!”
- “I can easily handle challenges that I face in my life!”
Part XI: Body language
The body language of a person reflects its confidence. A person that is not self-confident will avoid eye-contact with others, avoid body contact to others, speak under its breath and walk with dropped shoulders. A person that clearly displays with its body language to be not confident will also be considered from others to be not self-confident, which increases its self-doubts and self-consciousness.
While the majority of people do know the fact that the body language of a person reflects its confidential state; they are not aware that a change in their posture and body language can have major impacts on their self-awareness.
To increase this positive effect of your body language on your self-confidence you could imagine how a person with high self-esteem that is ultimate self-confident would move, look and react. Try to adopt his body language and feel the positive effects on your confidence! The next time you face a situation where you normally behave not self-confident at all you should try to remember the behavior of the favorite famous person!
Self-confidence quotes and self-esteem quotes:
“It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else’s eyes.” ~ Sally Field
“Whether you think you can or think you can’t – you are right.” ~ Henry Ford
“A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him or her.” ~ David Brinkley
“It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not.” ~ Unknown
“I am convinced all of humanity is born with more gifts than we know. Most are born geniuses and just get de-geniused rapidly.” ~ Buckminster Fuller
Photo by vramak
Ultimate Self Confidence was brought to you by The Road to Success.